Satire - Don's Diary
For this week's Don's Diary, click here.
June 02 10.00pm
Home with bedtime cocoa after interview with Larry Williams. Have lost count of the number of times I have been interviewed by Larry, although nowhere near the number of times I have been on Paul's show. As I said to him on Monday (or was it Tuesday?), he just keeps on getting better as his audience keeps on getting smaller. Good interview with Larry although when being questioned by him I always feel I should have a lawyer present. Something to do with his manner and haircut. Richard, who knows these things, says Larry has never completely outgrown his years as a traffic cop in Timaru.
June 03 1.30pm
Will never forget the moment I learned that we had drawn ahead of Helen in the polls. I was in the kitchen, slicing next week's corned beef, peas boiling away merrily. I was just about to start pre-cutting the squares of Gladwrap and smoothing them out on the bench (a fiddly job at the best of times) when Jen Le showed me the NBR. Quickly wrapping the corned beef slices and stacking them in the freezer, I seized her in my arms. She resisted, mindful as always of my tie. But I said "Don't worry about that now, I can always put on another one from the seven I iron on Sundays for the week ahead."
June 04 11.00am
Congratulatory call from Winston. Music in the background, sounded like "Tea for Two". Assured him that I knew he was just joshing whenever he called me a slow, old, past-it, over-the-hill has-been in the House. Charming as always with immaculate manners, remembering to send his fond best wishes to Jen Le, who he calls Jen Don.
June 05 6.00pm
Pleasant drive out in the country looking at the billboards. Murray has done a wonderful job although Jen Le was puzzled about the "Beaches". If Helen gave them to iwi, why the Maoris so annoyed at her?